I woke up this morning a little earlier than usual, trying to get a jump on my day. I’m not much of morning person. But I’ve learned that how you start your morning is how you set your intention for the day, and today I was ready to rock my world.

Sitting down at the home office desk, I checked email, returned a couple of messages and shot out a few more, then my husband turned on the TV in the kitchen and asked, “Did you see this?” Popped over to CNN and boom. And just like that, our world has changed again.

“Worst Mass Shooting in US History”. At least 50 dead and I think it was 200 injured as of eastern time this morning.  As of this writing, the number has grown to at least 58 dead and over 500 injured. All by one man. One man inflicting evil from the 32nd floor of a hotel on concert goers below. One man with a stockpile of weapons and ammunition that, of course, we allow to happen in country because the 2nd amendment and the NRA protect his rights.

That familiar, sickening feeling deep in my core returns once again. But this time I’ll be honest, my first thought was: “Worst mass shooting in US history? Only until the next time.” As appalling as this horror is  – and the scale of it is surreal – at this rate, a “next time” is inevitable. It’s like the Evil Loser Club of America has a bunch of members who are playing a vicious game, trying to outdo one another by scoring a greater number of kills on the leaderboard, the leaderboard being any news headline in the US.

I’ve been to Las Vegas. It’s not my favorite place to go, but I appreciate the draw. Even if you’re not a gambler, there is something you can find to enjoy there, unless you are among the most religiously conservative of types. Anyway, I know a whole group of people heading there for a conference and I immediately shot one my friends a text hoping to GOD she was not already there, and possibly among the crowd. She’s ok….she hasn’t left yet. Whew. I suspect I will end up knowing someone who was touched in some way.

And then this is where I am at a loss what to say and do next. Pray? Yes. That’s a given. Rail against the 2nd amendment? I’m not sure what good that would do. As I heard others say regarding Sandy Hook, when we as a country decided that mass violence against children was OK, it was “game over.”

Except those evil losers? They’re still in the game, trying to outdo each other.

Look, I don’t own a gun. I didn’t grow up with a gun culture, and I will tell you that I’m uneasy around them, period. I get that people have one, maybe more, for protection. To each his own. Some of my HS classmates would miss school during hunting season. Ok. Not my thing, but ok.

And I understand the spirit and environment under which the 2nd amendment was written, but I don’t get how we let people acquire an arsenal with the ammunition to match. These angry people are waging a war in their head until one day they snap for reasons often unknown. Are you telling me we are powerless to stop it? There is NOTHING we will do? What does it take, America?

I suppose we don’t need Hollywood types to dream up the next God-awful scenario…they will play out before our eyes. What’s next? Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade? New Year’s Eve in Times Square? The next high school or college graduation gathering thousands in an open air arena? Brace yourselves folks, it’s coming. You know the next one is coming. What you don’t know is if you or someone you love will be in that crowd.

You gotta love Albert Einstein who said, “Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

America: I beg of you, on behalf of those killed and injured and the loved ones they leave behind in Vegas, the Pulse in Orlando, Virginia Tech, San Bernadino, Aurora, and our beloved children at Sandy Hook: DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT ABOUT GUNS IF YOU WANT DIFFERENT RESULTS.

God grant peace to your servants who have fallen asleep and comfort to those they leave behind.

Author: silonda

I'm not your average Midwestern American woman: an older mom to three kids and married to a musician, hiding out in a small town. I’ve worked as a serious business professional my entire adult life but my soul is really an artist. Wonderlust (i.e., insatiable curiosity) and wanderlust lead me to read voraciously and travel often. The introvert in me likes to quietly observe and share what I discover through writing but buried inside is a pretty funny chick full of spunk and verve who is eager to come out and play. Deep thinking and feeling (all the feels) is my default mode and then I'll crack a joke about it. I’m constantly striving to cultivate whatever makes for beautiful and to love UP.

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