Family Photo Phobic

I wrote recently about cultivating the small moments that happen now, not wishing and waiting for the day when something happens or some goal far-off goal is achieved. I decided it was time to take my own advice so we booked a date the first weekend of this month for an outdoor family photo shoot.

First let me say that call it what you want, I’m not as fit as I’d like to be…I don’t look as good (or feel as good) as I know I can. There are very few photos of me in….oh….the last 15 years that I like very much. That’s not to say there haven’t been any, but seeing me in two-dimensional form is a bit of a jolt, and now that I’ve packed on the “2017 Trump Twenty”, it’s even worse. Who would’ve thought I’d stress eat over a president, but we live in strange times…

The only formal photo shoot we had for the kids together was five years ago and omigosh! They’ve grown so much since then. Back then my husband and I did not plan to get in the pictures. Our friend, photographer Dawn Biery-Jackman in Pittsburgh snapped a few anyway, including one of my absolute favorites of my daughter and me.IMG_0664 The fact that this was captured on film should have been reason enough to get photos taken all the time, but I didn’t.

Look at it: I love how her arms around my neck and our two heads form a heart. I love our smushed-together cheeks, my crinkly eyes, her little half moons eyes, and her adorable little tooth-fairy ready smile. This picture is love, love, all love. I am so grateful to have this photo to cherish.

The day of the photo shoot, I thought I was too chubby, my hair too wiry, my clothes too blah. No eyelashes. Do I even have any eyebrows? Why did I think blond highlights were a good idea?

Stupid, I know. I see none of that now.

My husband is 100% supportive of me no matter how I look – he always tells me that I’m beautiful – but it’s a difficult thing to overcome the negative self-talk. At least he is somewhat sympathetic as he doesn’t like formal pictures of himself either but we cast our doubts aside for a couple of hours one afternoon last Saturday. So glad we did.

Props to our local photographer, Ursula DeCesare, this weekend’s photo shoot completely Thankfulblows me away. The kids are pretty photogenic so that’s a plus but her artistic eye, direction, choice of scenery, and creativity elevated the whole endeavor to something downright magical.

So magical it’s been decided: we’re doing a photo shoot annually from now on and you wanna know why?

One day one or more of us will be gone. And regardless of whatever we may be thinking at the time, when it’s all said and done, all we will see is love, love, all love.


Author: silonda

I'm not your average Midwestern American woman: an older mom to three kids and married to a musician, hiding out in a small town. I’ve worked as a serious business professional my entire adult life but my soul is really an artist. Wonderlust (i.e., insatiable curiosity) and wanderlust lead me to read voraciously and travel often. The introvert in me likes to quietly observe and share what I discover through writing but buried inside is a pretty funny chick full of spunk and verve who is eager to come out and play. Deep thinking and feeling (all the feels) is my default mode and then I'll crack a joke about it. I’m constantly striving to cultivate whatever makes for beautiful and to love UP.

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